May 09, 2008

batman vs. superman

My top ten reasons why Batman is better than Superman:

10: Michael Keaton, George Clooney, Val Kilmer, and Christian Bale...vs. Christopher Reeves? What?

9: Flying car vs. red cape.

8: (For all you green people) Batman uses the resources that he has in his possession to create enough power to save the world. at the newspaper...a business that kills thousands of trees every day. Beat that.

7: Batman fights poverty, oppression and the abuse of underground druglords. Superman just repeatedly rescues Lois from her own stupidity...and occassionally he prevents some car accidents. But seriously, he's only had one arch nemisis. How much can you do after you've killed Lex Luther?

6: Alfred. Need I say more...

5: Batman is not an avenger. He chooses to continue in the path his father began, to help the poor and oppressed of his society. When his mother and father were killed, he rose up to restore the society that forced people into the murderous lifestyles they had fallen into. Do we need a lesson in repentance and forgiveness???

4: Batman dresses in black. Like Johnny Cash, and the Men in Black - he makes that look gooooooood. Superman looks like he woke up at the circus.

3: Batman actually has a good disguise. You can't REALLY tell who he is when he has his costume on. Superman just takes his glasses off and puts some more gel in his little curl. Besides, now that there are no more phone booths, what does he do? Run into the nearest AT&T store????

2: Superman isn't really a superhero. He just came from a planet where they apparently had a lot more gravity.

1: Last but not least, HOLY TOLEDO BATMAN! He kicked Arnold's butt. Which means, he could technically take over California...but more importantly, Batman whooped up on Mr. Universe.

Now, the boys in my life all think Superman is the better choice, but they're entitled to be wrong. Besides, Mike is biased toward the Clark Kent/Superman dual persona . . . judge for yourself:

1 comment:

Kevin's BLAH-G said...

First of all it's SUPERMAN! vs. batman not the other way around. And in answer to all you little side questoins. SUPERMAN!!!!!! and he can fly that makes him like the coolest person ever!