5 hard questions from Janice

Okay, so I gave Janice the “go ahead” to ask me some interview questions, hoping for some fluffy, fun questions. Apparently, I forgot who I asked, ‘cause these are HARD!

1. You are in a unique position to see the good and bad side of Christians in our church. What is your biggest encouragement?
Truly, my biggest encouragement is watching people change, myself included. I love the shift our church family as a whole continues to make from being all about “having it right” to being more about “having God’s heart”. I love that we continue to focus on getting outside our walls and into people’s lives - into our community - granted, it’s a slow process, but at least we are not stagnant.

2. Other side of the coin, what has been your biggest disappointment?
Selfishness. People who aren’t givers - of themselves, of their time, of their way, of their money. People filled with excuses as to why they “can’t”. That, and the fact that my chromosomes don’t allow me to be seen in the way I would like to be seen sometimes.

3. What is your absolute best marriage tip?
Learn to accept the fact that it is not his job to make you happy - joy comes from God alone. Your job is to just be who God calls you to be, to love unselfishly, and to use every day to become a better person. Happiness is never a goal . . . just a hopeful, occasional by-product.

4. Did you/Do you EVER have days when your kids drove/drive you nuts? (Please don't say no.) What did you do?
No, my children are perfect. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

YES! They drive/drove/have driven me nuts and, Lord-willing, will continue to drive me nuts for many years to come! What do I do? Listen. Ask questions. Don't overreact. There's a reason they are driving me nuts, I just have to figure it out. Maybe they are tired. Or frustrated. Or feeling they are being treated unfairly. Or . . . you name it. There's almost nothing in ANY relationship that can't be worked out with a little good communication, which starts with good listening.

Now, if there was direct defiance/disobedience/or sheer laziness, that's a different ballgame. The way I figure it, my kids are entitled to water and oxygen. Past that, the rest is gravy. I never "warn them" ahead of time that I will discipline, and I "almost" never yell (I yelled once in 1998 and my kids have NEVER let me live it down, they love to tell that story on mom . . . ), but once bad behavior rears its ugly little head, privileges start disappearing quickly. And I am doggone consistent. If I say no computer for a week, baby it will be 168 full hours, and not one second less. And if there is whining about the discipline, it instantly gets doubled.

Of course, since my kids really are perfect, all of the above is merely untested theory . . .

5. What is the best advice you can give about a grandiose wedding? I am looking for the best things and the things best left out.
Kacey & Nathan’s was not all about bigger and better, but it was all about unique and personal. Best things - the ceremony, the location, the details, the people involved should all be very special to your families. Things most worth spending money on: photography and food. Things best left out - stress. So totally not worth it. My best advice is to start early, delegate as much as possible, and pay people to clean up when it’s all over ‘cause by then you are EXHAUSTED!